Inner-Battles Everlasting

There are times in which, try as I might, to brush off, ignore, or even attempt to whole-heartedly resist my own cynical nature; well, it simply escapes my control.

This demon of uncontrollable worldly criticism, is that, which I absolutely detest most in this world; essentially my mind’s very own pessimistic, inner philosopher/psychologist/heckler/douschbag drill sergeant wielding a megaphone aimed at my cerebral cortex. It is a voice of doom & gloom, which only grows louder & louder, until all that there is really left to do, is listen.

It gets too loud to ignore…

These are times of long or short term hardship.

A hardship of many forms, in fact, it would not be a very long stretch of reality, to say that these are times of a all-encompassing general inner struggle. A struggle, which simply leads to suffering, a great deal of suffering in fact, and then ultimately to some sort of self-submission.

In most of the cases which I speak of, the submission is not to any sort of greater good, or a kind of life-changing epiphany, and instead usually tends to simply kick the can down the road, and pretend that, we, meaning I, are or am, done struggling, done fighting the same battle that, I, coming to my senses, have concurred that submission is the only way of proceeding to surviving.

Perhaps this is simply a na√Įve, primitive, all too human instinctual inability to follow my deepest convictions.

In any case, if it has not become evident to you already, dear reader, this battle is not to be the last one, in fact, broadly speaking, it is one of what could perhaps be millions, at this point at least, of similar such inward struggles. Struggles of the self, of the mind, of the we, of the collective, and struggles that seemingly have no clear resolution or definition.

The result of which, leads me to ponder any point to it all…

Well, after a while, I think to myself, what the fuck exactly, is there for me to do?

If I had any clue in the least, any fucking clue at all, what exactly the fucking answer is…

…well, fuck, that’s what we’d be writing about, I’d be writing about, and if you were expecting answer at the end of this here shitty fucking post; well sorry, because you’re honestly not going to fucking get it!

Fact is, I don’t fucking know, and maybe that’s the fucking answer in & of itself; but probably not. All things considered, I’m almost 99.99% fucking sure it’s not the answer, so fuck it, what else do I got to do with my existence for the next duration of my fucking existence.

Yeah, so I guess I’ll just get back to fucking searching.

Oh, and is it just me, or did I use a lot of ‘fucks‘ in that last no fucks given portion of the post?

In any case, have a great night, day, morning etc. yah fucks.

…Oh, and P.S., kindly fuck off.

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A great honest discussion between British superstar Russell Brand & Jordan Peterson on the various topics hindering our society (in the WEST) today…

www.youtube.com/watch

The now world-renowned academic, J. Peterson discusses various subjects of social & individual behavior mentioned in his latest bestseller, with actor, author, rockstar, and leftwing U.K. activist R. Brand.

The Sacred & the Insane

li /cd”Man becomes aware of the Sacred because it manifests itself, shows itself, as something wholly different from the Profane … In his encounters with the Sacred, man experiences a reality that does not belong to our world yet is encountered in and through objects or events that are part of the world.”

¬†Many theories exist at present, which aim to ease the burden of life’s intrinsic mysteries; most of which, if I might add, wholly view the world we inhabit, through a purely physical, materialistic, and scientifically oriented lens of observation.

Unfortunately for humanity, it is through this notably discriminatory¬†lens,¬†through which the various concepts of our current and future reality, are shaped. ¬†In fact, the visions which our species sees through this¬†lens’s tiny¬†window, one, that pervasively laces a thick black vinaigrette over the truest representations of what & why¬†a human -*ing is actually human,¬†began to forcefully manifest themselves into¬†how we view¬†life,¬†and it’s real meaning itself.

¬†In essence, we are, quite undeniably, exactly that. ¬†We are, what our individual understanding of being us, human, really is…

Now, modern man, at least in the majority of cases which we can easily observe ourselves, has a tendency to accept the concepts drawn up by those granted the task of intellectual discovery. ¬†It is, unfortunately, this very tendency itself, which has led to our broadly spanning spiritual detriment, not only in our academic institutions but throughout society at large. ¬†‘WE’, as a species, after millennia upon millennia of struggling to try and truly understand our, inner ‘conscious selves’, along with the countless awe-inspiring feats of human ingenuity thrust ahead from generation to generation, which, undeniably came as the result of this self-exploration; have almost inevitably, become victims of our own inability to accept anything that contradicts the unspoken rule of humanity’s archaically modern, eternal march towards the ultimate goal…

…killing the God which we once died for, and taking his place.

This might sound like something you’d see written on Nietzsche’s gravestone, in which case, if at all interested in anything more meaningful then, let’s say, a totally fucked up video on Facebook, perhaps you might go home later on and look up Nietzsche. ¬†After reading up on him(or youtube-ing him), and his many theories, you may see things a bit more conceptually solid on the matter.

 Man wants to be God.

The √úbermensch(Superman).

Etc., etc.

Well, that’s all well and dandy n’all, especially if the goal is to die a babbling, raving mad lunatic in a manic hardcore depression, with half your brain rotted away at the core… carry on bromigo, looks like smooth sailing ahead brotha.

In my own perception of ‘LIFE‘, I honestly tend to take the¬†√úbermensch¬†idea, with a slight grain of salt(or two).

If you’re too lazy to read up on Nietzsche, or his many works, which I do wholeheartedly embrace as exceptionally composed(although not always in agreement with my own views), well here’s the man himself with some elaboration on that¬†√úbermensch¬†I previously mentioned…


“The word √úbermensch [designates] a type of supreme achievement, as opposed to ‘modern’ men, ‘good’ men, Christians, and other nihilists … When I whispered into the ears of some people that they were better off looking for a Cesare Borgia than a Parsifal, they did not believe their ears.”[9]¬†


Some may unwittingly, or unknowingly agree with Nietzsche in certain aspects. ¬†For example, God, at least the idea of ‘a God’,¬†be it a deity, a spiritual ideology, the afterlife, karma, or any other form of mythic worldviews, are viewed by many¬†modern men,¬†with a certain degree of contempt. ¬†It is a broadly held view, that ‘we are past that‘; that¬†we are now the champions of our own destiny, no longer bound by the suffocating and (what is, within a Nietzsche-que styled understanding)ignorant boundaries of religious doctrine. ¬†There is an underlying misconception among-st nearly all walks of societal life, that religion, mythic understanding, spiritualism, and any other form of non-scientific based concepts; are WRONG. ¬†Wrong, as in not correct,¬†not¬†real,¬†not at all¬†relevant to the modern world, as well as the future ahead…

Plain & simple.

In a way, quite reflective of how we tend to like things.

This is, at least in the eyes of many influential, more open-minded scholars(including myself), extremely unwise, dull-witted, depressing, and completely the opposite, of how humanity, in general, might hope to elevate itself into a brighter, enlightened, as well as further spiritually and physically fulfilled future…

I am NOT, any sort, type, kind, or even variation of, the presently all-powerful intellectual junta, which acts, in many ways, as a gatekeeper of our thus-far cultivated knowledge as a conscious, rational race of men.¬† In all honesty, I have up unto this point, never, at all considered myself to stand within the post-modern elitist class of standardized¬†professional¬†philosophers; nor do I see ANY future inclinations to change in this regard.¬† The plain academically¬†approved¬†specialists of informational gratification.¬† NOT for you, her, him, them, us, or any motherfucker with preconceived perceptions of grandeur, and for that matter, no-one really is, to be completely honest.¬† What am I even writing about? What the fuck am I actually attempting to convey in that, strangely unclear, possibly just flat-out ridiculous, statement above…?

Well, for a start, I do not believe that anyone and I mean ANYONE, actually has the right to stake their claim,¬†in the all-knowing throne of the divine….Once again, THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN…

Well…

The truth, is simply that truth, in & of itself,¬†is, interestingly enough, quite individualistic in mains cases.¬† Essentially, your reality, in a somewhat semi-literal sort of sense at least,¬†is one which¬†you personally craft make it;¬†meaning, that you are, or better yet, the voices of those which you, for whatever reason, find relevant, as well as trustworthy enough of one’s faith to have believe, or perceive as¬†the¬†experts within the broadly speaking respective field in question, manifest into that which you understand to be¬†the truth.

You have no real reason to believe them.  Then again, perhaps, there is a reason.

They tell you to…

Those which you honestly trust; well, also will attempt to tell you such nonesense.

So…why wouldn’t you.

Look at all that noise above. Yes, it is notably, quite fucking confusing. It is not just your possible lack of intellectual prowess, which be, or not be, as it may; ‘should’, be currently undergoing a certain kind of growth in a sense. At least if you are allowing the gears of your personal machine to turn properly. Which realistically, simply comes down to the very basic, and fundamentally mind-altering task of ACTUALLY THINKING on the concepts currently being laid out in front of you.

To say the least…

It makes little sense, in terms of the respective reality which one creates, lives within, and ultimately makes their own. This, in most cases at least, remains one which is very worldly and very-much unoriginal.

Such realities, although commonly overlooked by the vast majority of simple minded folk, walking through life like lost souls in purgatory, is in all apparent truth, not-your-own. It is a reality composed with the millions of jumbled up tidbits, from every corner of your entire pointless lifespan. An ultimately ‘preconceived’ reality, to put it bluntly I suppose.

Now, when taken into SERIOUS consideration, the fact of the matter is, that well, quite troubling to say the least. Due to the fundamental idea that you, as a thinking, living, human being, are, in many ways exactly that. A patchwork of garbage conceptual white noise, exanorated from any form of serious individualism, personal worth, or generally positive spiritual belief in anything other than those, deeply imbedded materialistic world views mentioned above.

¬†In basic terms, you have not understood your own conscious self…

As I rally back to end this little expos√© of man’s modern lack of faith, there was many a time, when I honestly had to refrain myself from drowning out my own damned argument through various unwinding tangents; which, if I may honestly admit, seem to nevertheless unwittingly spin out of control at every turn.

We are, and always will be a spiritual, mystic animal.

Although it may seem, perhaps today more-so than any other point in time of our history, unfaithful to the world of the sacred & the profane, I wouldn’t bet on this inner fire, within each and every human being that has ever lived, being stamped out anytime soon.

Humanity Flawed.

Humanity is flawed…

…That’s a given.

 

As much as we’d like to believe, that our understanding of this statement is absolute; many times the understanding of our understanding may, in fact, not reflect as much.

Strangely enough, when thinking in terms of humanity in general, this is true almost always; yet at times we(depending on who you are exactly) sometimes stray from this understanding.  Essentially, we tend to come to much different conclusions on the possible outcome of any given situation(for better, or worse), when it involves us within those included amongst the involved parties.  This is perhaps, simply one more, out of our countless human flaws, which may be added to the already mountainous pile, of those well-known to man for ages.

We tend to believe quite strongly in the honest truth of our naturally flawed, shared nature, at least when observing or discussing the presence of various imperfections displayed amongst human beings in the general sense.  Now, if it is me involved in a situation, the whole equation changes.

The vaccine needle breaks inside of us.

The shrooms you ate were somehow tainted.

This disease might be wayyy worse than it really is.

I’d kill the damn terrorist if I was there…

Either we see ourselves playing a much more positive role in the picture, or; we allow the outcome of something, in many cases of a quite casual nature, to spiral into a very negative image indeed.

Either way, we are inevitably prone to such a polarized worldview.

That said, the case we find ourselves in is quite a decent one to cope with.

Simply put, I propose a systematic reversal of any negative imaginary situations, in exchange for only the positive, glorified daydreams in

which we score the winning goal, we save the school from an armed group of international terrorists, where we save the damsel and get the girl.

I mean why not?

First of all, a positive mentality has recently been proven to project out into the physical prosperity in the real world by scientists across the spectrum.

Second of all, if the above seems to be the truth, a replacement of negative daydreams with those of a more positive nature, should, in fact, lead us to slightly, in the very least, more prosperous and fulfilling lives.

Right?

In any case,¬†that’s my understanding on the matter…

-B.M. StrIX.

Flashbang

FLASH

¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† …And then a sizzle coupled with a faint ringing, which meant that I was, at least for the moment, still alive.

Now; sprawled out on the dust coated cement, and unsure exactly how I had gotten here, I instinctively drew my hands from my still crippled eyes.

Initially an attempt to gain any grasp whatsoever of the unfolding scene around my shaking, neutralized body through means of the ears was a failure, prevented by the still persistent ringing deep inside my skull.

 In that moment I realized that the senses which, I, under usual circumstances rely upon in gauging a situation, were currently compromised.

Then, very cautiously, I tried to open up just a sliver of sight. The idea proved a bit rushed, as a foggy white film greeted me.  I closed them once more for a while, as the ringing in my ears slowly subsided.

Even with my ears still largely unusable, I realized very quickly that I was not alone in that damp, dark room.

…very quickly I realized my previously accessed fears, were in fact my present reality.

Now,

They were here.

They had come for me…

 

 

 

Just Another Insomniac

There are, as most of you can relate to, a good many things to keep a man(or woman for that matter) awake at night…

A GOOD MANY indeed.

If you take your average American for example; bills, debts, addiction, the¬†President,¬†the economy, ISIS, Healthcare, death, relationships, former-relationships, rent, stray bullets, climate change, kids, family, etc, etc….and etc, are just a sliver of various issues individuals in this sleepless category may be internally processing in the dead of night.

Most silently, and in utter-seclusion from the rest of the world.

I for one, sincerely wish that I was not a member of this club…

…Unfortunately, I happen to have a platinum membership. ¬†But; t’fuck can one do….

(…beer comes to mind.)

In any case, here I am, I am here. ¬†So… fuck it.

Or not.

Perhaps a broad analysis of an unaddressed, widespread epidemic, of baseless insomnia is in order?

I have, within recent years exposed an underlying current of general discontent among a very wide spectrum of Americans, men, and woman, from of all walks of life. ¬†Many times for no apparent reason at all. ¬†This infectious sense of silent, yet powerful dissatisfaction, is by no means evident, on the face, within standard conversation, or through social behaviors; at least, if not first hoisted up from the depths of the individual’s soul.

In order to expose any given person’s dark insecurities, not for the purpose of proliferation, yet instead to attempt some form of open-forum for the soul, one must NEVER forceful interject an actual proposal to do so. ¬†Any push into another’s deepest torment,¬†may not be perpetrated for nefarious reasons, only as means for the well-being of a fellow human being.

For starters, human beings are like onions. ¬†If you’ve ever watched the first¬†Shrek¬†movie, you probaly understand this concept already. ¬†If you have not;¬†do so. ¬†NOW…


The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”
Albert Einstein

Many things fascinate the human mind; algorithms, equations, drugs or sex. ¬†‘Good’, or ‘evil’…

In fact, a great deal of variation is evident, in terms of individual mental stimuli .  That, is quite clear; as, is indeed the undeniable center of fascination for all humans, even since the very birth of our species.

Our minds are, at least in almost all cases, quite fond of inquisitive ‘things’, and, at least in many cases; these ‘things’, are questions, usually derived, or influenced by the world around us, yet ultimately of our own design.

One such question, stands undoubtedly supreme. That, which questions, the very nature of our existence here on earth; generally, or individually…

Why are we here exactly?

I, personally, have yet to find any sort of fucking clue…

…as, indeed do you.

True story.

The End…

Sorry.